Hello and hope the days continue to treat You well -and- that Spring has (finally) begun to show Itself where You live. In Indianapolis, we are beginning to see more trees in bloom, more flowers showing themselves, -and- even the need to cut the grass, ( I’ve cut our lawn twice in the past 2 weeks! )
Just as Spring ushers in the welcome change from Winter -and- symbolically, it represents renewal, rebirth, new beginnings and growth, I would like to support the same symbolism for our ‘Encore Phase’ of our Life.
Specifically, the real change in our ‘Encore Phase’ begins when we stop trying to convince others we are fine and started asking ourself what “fine” actually means to Us. Not the socially acceptable version of fine, the authentic kind.
I read this quote from Life Coach, Jeanette Brown; “Feeling lost or unsettled is not only normal—it’s necessary.” These words can be the permission we need to stop pretending everything must be perfect in retirement and actually sit with the discomfort of transition… instead of planning for retirement, consider planning for something much more meaningful!
Make an effort to redeploy your time, talents and energy in pursuit of a renewed purpose. Think of it as a bold, countercultural move that rejects the traditional American retirement mindset of passive consumption and purposelessness. Instead of exiting the stage, step onto a new stage.
Consider this, in retirement, those career and job-focused identities disappear, and when we aren’t careful, so does the purpose that every one of us needs.
Instead of retiring from something, let’s consider it’s an opportunity to aspire to something more at this time in our life. It’s the next chapter in our story, not the end of the book. This opportunity is a reinvestment in a calling. It is a chance to love with the same passion we had in earlier our years, only now through new platforms.
Here’s another aspect nobody prepares us for: in retirement, we become our own boss. After decades of having someone else set priorities and deadlines, the freedom to choose can be paralyzing.
We keep waiting for someone to tell us what our retirement should look like. What should I focus on? What new things are acceptable for someone my age to try?
This permission-seeking habit can keep us in a holding pattern.
Another trap is the comparison habit. It can be particularly poisonous in retirement because it assumes there’s a “right way” to do it. However, retirement isn’t a competition or a performance. It’s just Life, continuing in a different form.
Living in the Rear View Mirror… This backward-looking habit is perhaps the most insidious because it felt like honoring the past rather than dwelling on it. But there’s a difference between appreciating your history and living in it. Spend too much time thinking of the past work life and how it defined us, we are essentially agreeing with the voice that said our best days were done.
One last trap; during our working years, busy meant important. A packed calendar meant we mattered. No availability until next month meant we were essential. This equation was so deeply embedded in our psyche that retirement felt like a demotion from important to irrelevant.
Don’t become trapped in to scheduling things just to stay busy. Start saying no to things that are just calendar fillers and You will find space to discover what You actually want to do, not what You thought You should do to appear valuable.
Breaking these habits isn’t about becoming lazy or unproductive. It is about redefining what a meaningful day looks like when we’re no longer measuring it by work metrics.
Being genuinely fine means accepting that retirement isn’t a destination but another transition, as complex and challenging as any other major life change. It means grieving what we lost while remaining open to what might emerge. It means being honest about the hard days without feeling like we are failing at retirement.
Just know as You walk through the stages of retirement and find yourelf feeling lost inside, know that you’re not alone. The gap between appearing fine and being fine is where the real work happens, where transformation lives. It’s uncomfortable and uncertain, but it’s also where You might discover parts of yourself that have been waiting patiently for their moment to emerge.
The best part is not over, it just looks different!
Continue stepping forward in the ‘Encore Phase‘ with enthusiasm and eagerness -and- please continue to take care of yourself, make the most of your days -and- always remember;
“Never quit searching, never settle and never give up seeking your greater purpose!“
Terry's Thoughts 
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