Lessons Learned From The Kitchen Table Talk

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Yesterday was Father’s Day! A belated Happy Father’s Day and hope You had a wonderful day!

Each year Father’s Day is a day of reflection for me. I never stop thinking of my Father – he has been gone for 30 years. Definitely a life cut way too short. My Father passed away in 1993 at the age of 63.

My Father was an extremely hard working, humble, quiet man and lived for and loved his Family and Friends! He served in the Korean War, (and was awarded 2 Silver Stars during his tour.) We were only aware of one Silver Star because he had that one. I learned from my Uncle he had traded one of his Silver Stars for a pipe during his tour. I know, crazy trade!).

Getting back on track. ( I could share many more stories like this but can not within this article). My Father owned the grocery store with his GodFather in our small town. I am from a small steel town outside of Pittsburgh, in the Beaver Valley which sits along the Ohio River. My hometown is Midland, Pennsylvania.

My Father never relied upon recognition for his accomplishments or for doing anything that would have been considered “above and beyond,” because he never thought of his efforts, his works, his contributions anything “above and beyond.” Everything was, well, just what You were suppose to do and did!

My Father worked 14+ hour days; 6 days a week, ( the store was open at 6am for the men starting the 7am-3pm shift and he would close at 9pm for the men going to the grave yard shift; 11pm-7am). He would also put in a couple of hours Sunday mornings to take inventory when we would be at church. We did not take Family vacations and my Father did not take days off. The exception was on occasion, he would take several days so we could make the drive to Indianapolis to visit my Uncle John, my Father’s oldest Brother. My Uncle John was my Father’s dearest Friend; not just his Brother.
(*note: my Uncle John was the other major influence in my life -and- the reason for this note, my Father made certain I would spend as much time with my Uncle and learn from him and his life. My Father never wanted me to come into the store or work the steel mill. Not that there was anything wrong with going to work in the store or the mill. However, my Father knew that there was more -and- that would provide options/opportunities for me and for my Family into the future…that’s what he wanted for me and my Sisters.)

I provide this bit of background to share an amazing account of an outstanding Man, my Father! Although, he was not Home a large portion of a day’s time, my Sisters and I were blessed and received the most incredible gift (anyone) could have received; a loving and caring Father!

My Father taught us many things through his example of “just doing” and we learned the importance of . . .

• hard work, compassion, persistence, integrity, honesty, self-reliance
• taking responsibility
• being indifferent to superficial honor
• putting people at ease -and-
• treating people as they deserved to be treated

With little time to spend with us, how did my Father provide these valuable lessons?

First, by his example and being a ‘role model’ -and- then, a lot of the teaching/lessons occurred at our KITCHEN TABLE!

Yes, that ole time visual of sitting around the kitchen table. All of the major lessons came from the talks my Father would have around that kitchen table. These ‘lessons’ did happen often when the (high school age) young men would stop the house to visit with my Father on Sunday afternoon’s, Holidays and sometimes, late summer evenings. ( btw: a few of these young men would stop by the house to visit even when they were older). They would stop in to visit and the ‘talks’ happened.

The discussions were about anything/everything. Of course, there was always good snacks, (home made cookies, fruit, pepperoni and cheeses -and- when the young men were old enough, wine on the table)

Listening in was how my Father ensured we learned the valuable lessons, (except of course when the ‘lesson’ was of a sensitive nature and we were too young, we would not be allowed to be sitting at the table).

I did not need to have a lot of one-on-one time with my Father. He was providing me with so much learning through his actions, (his work ethic and how he treated people) -and- through these discussions at the kitchen table.

The lessons were so valuable because my Father lived these words and exhibited these lessons/values by his actions as the role model he was; not only for my Sisters and me, it was with all the young men who worked at the store -and- how he treated Everyone to ensure they were treated properly.

Oh, one other thing my Father loved dearly, (and represented by the photo I used with this article). He so enjoyed cooking out! During the summer and most every Sunday, my Father would grill out! Nothing fancy, just the staples; hamburgers, home made sausage, (he made at the store), and on occasion, steaks. (of course, owning a grocery store helped with having nothing but quality on that grill!)… those Sunday afternoon grilling, my Father was at peace and soaked up that moment in time — he delighted in cooking out for us -and- was his time FOR US!

There is no better way to learn than from having the best of role-models and being with the individual who exemplifies those qualities and values You wish to posses in yourself.

Thanks Dad and missing You always.

Continue to take care and make the most of your days!

Never quit searching, never settle and never give up seeking your greater purpose!